3/23 Free Fucking Poems About Fucking @ Glitter Box Theater

7:30 SATURDAY

Welcome, fuckers, to the latest installation in FREE POEMS – FREE FUCKING POEMS ABOUT FUCKING. This time it’s about fucking.

Headlining Fuckers:
David Graham/ Requiem
Cherri Baum
Noel Pabillo Mariano
Chelsea Margaret Bodnar
John Thomas
Sundae Service
Kelly Boyker
Bebe Beretta
Michael Todd Schneider
Nikki Palmer

With face painting by Hanna Wilford! Get a dick or a vagina or some boobies or a butt plug or whatever painted on your face!

Also with poems/performances by: Ｍｉｓｓ　Ｍａｃｒｏｓｓ, Art Ettinger, Ed Pinto, Jeff Boyle, Kelly Lorraine Andrews, Nathan Moore, Olivia Devorah, Philip Kunkle, Sarah B Boyle, Shawn Maddey and a very very very (very) special performance from Peter Zumpano

And featuring like 20 other assholes we’ll have a list of eventually like fuck man this is a lot of work.

We’re changing up venues this time and will be fucking off at The Glitter Box Theater on Saturday, March 23rd for all the fucking you can handle, and a lot you probably can’t.

FREE FUCKING POEMS is an arts anarchy event themed around….wait for it…FUCKING, and vaguely around poetry.

If you have been solicited for a poem in the FREE FUCKING POEMS ABOUT FUCKING anthology, congratulations, you’re a performer! Let us know (here, via email, or via PM) if you plan to come out and share your fuck on stage so we can schedule a time slot for you to alienate all of your friends!

As always, there will be open stage time for anyone who writes and wants to read a (one, singular) fuck poem of their very own! We’ll let you know how we’re gonna deal with that closer to the event itself. Probably a sign up sheet. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it

JUST A HEADS UP YOU WILL SEE AT LEAST 1 DICK. LIKE, A REAL ONE NOT A PICTURE OF ONE AND PROBABLY LOTS OF OTHER GENITALS. SOMEONE GETS WEIRD ABOUT THIS AT EVERY FREE POEMS SO HERE IT IS IN CAPS RIGHT NOW. DICK DICK DICK DICK 8==D

FAQs

Q. How can I help/add to the FREE FUCKING experience?
A. We are so glad you asked! Oh my! How kind of you! We need help with everything from live-streaming the event to bringing beer and liquor, to bringing extra toilet paper (I cannot imagine Glitterbox is prepared for the amount of tp this event seems to go through), to bringing snacks! Closer to the event we will post a wish list, but if there is something you super duper want to bring my goodness, but we shall be chuffed!

Q. Can I sell/buy something/give you money/participate in late stage capitalism in any capacity at FREE POEMS?
A. No.

Q. What the fuck is FREE POEMS?
A. We don’t fucking know. FREE POEMS has happened 3 times now. It was born of a desire to giggle but also shed as much pretense and opportunism and FUCKING FASCISM from the experience of creative communion as possible and put a bunch of our genius but often overlooked friends all in a room at once and watch them be amazed by each other. First time was SNAKES, next was MONSTERS, then came JESUS. Now we’re here. We put together a book, too. We don’t fucking know.

Q. Can I read/perform at FREE POEMS?
A. I guess. Idk. Do you fuck? In all seriousness, yes there is open mic time integrated into FREE POEMS every year. You don’t need to let us know ahead of time if you will want to sign up, just show up and find the list. There is a time limit of one poem/2 minutes per person, though, so do keep that in mind.

Q. What is considered a poem at FREE POEMS?
A. Your question should probably be “what isn’t considered a poem?” because pretty much anything you want to read/perform/do on stage is a poem at FREE POEMS, provided it is on theme (fucking)

Q. I know a poet/band/trapeze artist/sex doll that would be perfect for your event! Can they perform?
A. If they can squeeze it into 2 minutes! Our lineup and the poems we put in the FREE POEMS book are all solicited, but the best way to get a featured spot/solicitation at a subsequent event, is to show up at FREE POEMS and do a thing on stage during open mic time. It is not by giving us beer or press or bj’s. That said, definitely give us beer. Maybe press. We can get our own bj’s tho, thanks. We’re not players we just crush a lot.

Q. Can I bring my kid?
A. LOL no not this time. We are legit going to show porn probably. Leave the kid at home for fuck’s sake. Even if they are 17. When they turn 18 take them to get their nipples pierced and bring them to FREE POEMS.

Q. Are there rules about content at FREE POEMS?
A. Your poem or performance must, in some way, be about/contain/depict FUCKING. Otherwise, we eschew censorship, so also keep that in mind as an audience member – people are probably going to say shit that makes you feel weird (good weird and bad weird). It’s ok to step outside if you get the vapors. And if you’re still mad at us after you get some air, it’s ok to go home and leave us the fuck alone, we’ll never get along.

DISCLAIMER: We shouldn’t have to say this, but alas. I don’t give a fuck what the content of someone’s performance is – don’t touch anyone without express consent to do so and don’t be a mean gross creeper. Also don’t fuck shame anyone for what they share. We have a bouncer named Rocco (seriously) and we are not afraid to use him.

DISCLAIMER #2: it occurred to Margaret when she was taking a shower yesterday that we should probably mention that this is not a play party or a swinger thing, it’s really honestly actually an art event. I mean, I hope someone goes home with someone else’s wife or something, and while you CAN spank someone at FREE POEMS (with consent, see disclaimer #1), we’re kind of here for art, too.